Love's Entanglement Page 8

  “He stuck his head out too, Philo,” Matteo reminded him. “And he walks in here, to have all this past dug up. Can you imagine how scared he must have been? The floor must have felt as if it had fallen out from under him. Can’t you just give him a breather?”

  Philo didn’t say anything for a bit, banging on something. “I would have if he had just talked to me, said something like he cared. Instead he was sneaking out of my room like I was a mistake.”

  “He didn’t mean it like that. You know Norris doesn’t have a cruel bone in his body. Your feelings were hurt.”

  “I guess.”

  “Can you forgive him?”

  “Depends on what he wants. I mean, does he care?”

  Matteo chuckled and stood, kicking the bucket away. “My work here is done. You two talk and I’m going back to my mate. No, I’m not taking Norris back as my trainee. You’re stuck with him. He wants to fly and you offered. No take backs.”

  “What?” Philo hissed, staring holes into Matteo’s head. All he did was smirk and point to where I was hiding.

  And those hazel eyes snapped to mine, rage and hurt filling them.

  “Before you get mad at him, I wasn’t patient with him when you sent him back, pretty much scared the shit out of him, and told him to stay there without informing him of my plan,” Matteo told him.

  “Is that true?” Philo hedged as he set down the mallet. I nodded so fast I was surprised my head didn’t snap off. Matteo gave us a wave neither of us paid attention to before hurrying off to his mate.

  “I thought his head was going to explode,” I blurted after a few minutes of us just staring at each other. Philo’s eyebrows shot up and I realized how stupid that sounded. “Matteo was ranting about how he needed a break too and he’s always involved where he doesn’t want to be and it’s not his fault that he can see things like my aura was all messed up and just to tell him what was really going on instead of lying to him like everyone does in the beginning because that makes it worse otherwise he was going to explode all over me.”

  Philo smirked, shaking his head. “Effective way to break someone into fessing up. Always thought the crazy card was a good one.”

  “No, I think he was serious. Nate looked worried. I think Matteo might need this place more than anyone,” I admitted and then kept rambling. We were talking which was good so I didn’t want to lose that. “I’ve been worried about him for a while. I know he was weird with me because of the rumors I thought were true and basically thinking I was going to lose my virginity with him and his mate, and that wigged him out. But he’s been different, drained almost. So many freaked-out post-trans without answers has gotten to him.”

  “Like transitioning early,” Philo muttered, twirling the mallet. “I’ll talk to my mum. She needs to know that for their therapy. They seriously need to let that go. Some things happen and who cares why. They survived their transition. It would be different if the change happened early and we lost them all. Our camp has the highest survival rate of any camp and that’s all because of Matteo and his study of how they transition, what’s the best routine for them—all of it.”

  “So basically we can’t lose him.” Philo nodded and I completely agreed. “I wouldn’t have made it through my transition without him. That’s for sure.” Matteo was good during a crisis. “Then again, watching that many transitions over the years, being the one to sit there and wonder if they’ll live, being right with them as they suffer through it all, can’t be easy.”

  Philo stared at me for several moments, making me squirm on the inside, but then he gave a swift nod. “See, I never thought you were an idiot. I’ll tell my mum that too.”

  “Okay, good.” Then I just stood there again, unsure what to do. “I wouldn’t ever just eavesdrop on you. I’m not that rude.”

  “Well you heard what you did,” he muttered, turning back to the plane. “What are your thoughts about it?”

  I took a deep breath and realized he was giving me the chance to fix a lot, and no matter what was racing in my mind, I needed to take it.

  “That you’re right. I shouldn’t ever have thought you would only train me for sex. You were patient with me and what I was going through. It wasn’t fair of me to even consider what I said. I’m sorry. I was upset, and Matteo was right, I felt—feel as if the whole floor came out from under me. I don’t know where I stand and I lost it.”

  He nodded as I moved closer, dropping the mallet and picking up a socket wrench. “So do we agree neither of us was playing games and whatever was going on was real?”

  “It was real for me,” I admitted. He glanced at me then, annoyance in his eyes and I flinched. “What?”

  “That’s not what I asked you. Do you think this was a game for me?”

  “No, no, I don’t,” I babbled, my eyes going wide. God, I could muck up anything, no matter how simple. “That’s not what I mean. I think it’s real for you too now that I heard you and Matteo. I don’t know much about games, but not in the sense like playing me, or me playing you. But maybe others, benign ones. I don’t know.”

  “What do you mean?” he hedged, stopping what he was doing and lowering his arm. I felt my cheeks heat up and Philo licked his lips. “Tell me, Norris. What are you talking about? I was trying to settle this so we could have some calm and now you’re stirring things up again.”

  Dammit, I was.

  I glanced down at my feet, my palms sweating as my heart raced. “I just meant I liked you before. I always thought you were the hottest warrior at the camp but kind of a jerk. I wanted to get near you so you would teach me how to fly but that wasn’t the only reason. I had dreams about you. You know that. I don’t think that’s playing games, but what do I know? Clearly not much.”

  “But now, since we crossed the line, what we have is real?” he rasped, moving closer.

  “Yes. I think we’re in agreement of that.”

  “Okay.”

  “Now what?” I whispered as I slowly raised my head and looked into his eyes.

  “Now I show you how to take apart this engine, clean it, and fix the fuel line,” he muttered, dropping his hand he had out as if he was going to touch me. Then he moved away by the engine and did just that. We got to work and Philo kept it work. It was weird and left me with lots of questions in the back of my mind, but it was exactly what I had asked for so I kept my mouth shut.

  It did however prove something I’d thought for a while… I had no idea what I really wanted or knew what was good for me.

  8

  Philo was an excellent teacher. He was smart, engaging, and kept things interesting while challenging me. I was so excited I studied manuals at night, using our photographic memories to sear it into my brain. That way when we worked on whatever was next, I was ready.

  And he was good with giving out the compliments when he saw I was trying. So five days into our new training while still in Italy, I’d learned more than I’d thought conceivable in that short amount of time.

  We also grew closer than I would have thought possible. But Philo always pulled away. Clearing his throat when the tension grew or quickly adjusting where he was in proximity to me, respecting my wishes to take a step back.

  And those awkward moments seemed to happen more and more. Like when I slid under the plane with him to bring him a tool and see what he was working on and didn’t have a good view, so without thinking, I scooted even closer… Until I flipped my cart from the unbalancing of my weight on it and caused Philo’s to slide out from under him and him onto me.

  “Sorry,” I whispered, his face inches from me. I hadn’t forgotten how good it felt to have him pressed against me, maybe just hadn’t realized how much I missed it when it had only been once. Could someone miss that? Want it again, then?

  “No problem, accidents happen,” he murmured, staring deeply into my eyes. He moved his hand by my head as his hips ground against mine. I moaned and it seemed to break whatever spell he’d been under. He shook his head and quick
ly rolled off me. “We should wrap up for the day anyways. Mum has some big dinner tonight and she would beat me if I came covered in grease.”

  “Then I should tell you that you’ve got a cute streak on your cheek that’s been there all day,” I chuckled as I rolled out from under the plane. I realized what I said as I got to my feet and met his eyes again, heat in them.

  “Yeah, thanks.” He hurried off and I cursed under my breath. It had seemed weird being with him after what we’d learned but it was really weird not being with him and all this awkwardness.

  Plus, I wanted him. I missed him.

  “You’re an idiot and you don’t get to choose what’s best for you anymore,” I bitched as I quickly put away the tools. Then I closed up the barn and ran to get ready as well. Maybe I could talk to Matteo if he seemed up for it? Or Verge. He seemed oddly wise for someone who hadn’t had many love interests to my knowledge.

  Maybe it was always easier from the outside?

  Either way, when I was all done scrubbing, I slid on the turquoise dress shirt Glenna had bought me that matched my eyes for the dinner. I had felt bad, until I realized she’d done it for a lot of us who hadn’t brought dress clothes. She did wink at me though so I figured she knew it matched my eyes. Then I tucked it into the grey dress pants, leaving open the first couple of buttons since we weren’t doing ties.

  I frowned at myself in the mirror. I looked like a kid who was playing dress-up.

  “You’re not a kid anymore. You’re twenty-five. Humans are real adults at this age,” I reminded myself. “Suck it up and be one. Besides, six-two is too short to be a child.”

  And with that as my parting pep talk to myself, I finished getting ready. I put a little gel into my mop of hair so it was actually the curls I tried to hide and tangle out. I figured I didn’t get as big as other warriors, no reason to seem less manly in their eyes by showing off I had a full head of blond locks.

  I took a deep breath and stepped out of my room to meet up with everyone.

  Philo was already there, a glass of wine in his hand, talking with Xana and Gilroy. He glanced over at me and did a double take. I smiled and headed their direction, but then once again felt the fool.

  “Philo!” a man behind me called out.

  “Artur,” Philo greeted and hurried over to the guy who breezed past me. I watched them hug, obviously knowing each other very, very well from the way Philo’s hand went pretty low on Artur’s lower back.

  Then Artur whispered something in Philo’s ear and he burst out laughing, like I’d never seen before, looking young and lighthearted, gorgeous and happy… And not with me. With this guy.

  You’re overreacting. He’s just a friend. A friend he hasn’t seen in a while. It’s no big.

  Philo moved away from the guy and got him a glass of wine, introducing Artur to Xana and Gilroy… Who both glanced over at me as if they didn’t know what to do. Philo followed their gaze and then I think he actually saw me, even though he’d been looking right at me earlier.

  I was twenty seconds from running from the room crying like a really bad teenage dramedy when Verge slid between our line of sights.

  “Love the curls. You look hot. Take a few deep breaths and drink this,” he ordered, handing me a glass. I did as he said, wincing at the burn of the alcohol as it went down. “Yeah, their booze is exceptionally strong here. Adore the sangria. Want to take home kegs of it.”

  “Good to know,” I coughed. Then he switched out the glasses in my hand, giving me a full one of what I guessed was the sangria.

  “There, now everyone won’t know you just did a triple shot of whiskey to calm your nerves, but just had some of your sangria. You’re all good. Sorry to interfere but I saw what happened. I don’t think many did but I did. I couldn’t not. It was like trying to take my eyes off a car crash but we can fix this so no one’s a fatality.”

  I nodded and had a sip, the stuff tasting like Kool-Aid after that much whiskey. But I knew it wasn’t.

  It was tasty though.

  “It’s no big deal, right? They’re just old friends probably,” I whispered to Verge as I darted a glance around him to see. He guided me to a corner of the party where we could both get a better, covert view.

  “I’m sure it is but you looked ready to toss your cookies or throw a fit right there so, yeah, I jumped on that,” he chuckled nervously.

  “Thanks. Thanks for that. You’re a good friend.”

  “Glad you think so because I’m about to be an even better one,” he hissed at me and then waved someone over with a huge smile. “Hey, Perfecta, have you met Norris?”

  “No, we haven’t. Charmed,” a gorgeous woman greeted, holding out her hand to me. I smiled and kissed it, totally not sure what to do. “Oh, you are a friend of Verge’s. Nice to know they teach you boys manners at that camp.”

  “No, not really, I think it’s overcompensating because we’re not socialized properly,” I admitted. “I wasn’t sure what to do so I went with extra formality because you’re nice and Verge’s friend.”

  She stared at me and then gave me a soft smile. “I appreciate your honesty. I’m also Glenna’s daughter. Verge was one of the warriors assigned to me to unload his burden.”

  “She’s awesome. Who did you get?” Verge praised, linking his arm with hers.

  I blinked at them both and then glanced over at Philo before meeting their now frowns. “Umm, I didn’t. Philo’s been training me out in the barn. We were supposed to be speaking with people? I thought that was only if we had issues with the attack? They attacked. We didn’t die.”

  “Oh shit, I thought everyone was handled,” Perfecta hissed, glancing around. “I’ll talk to mother after her party. I’m very sorry, Norris. You don’t have to talk to anyone. Everyone’s just taking this time to kind of unload what’s on their mind knowing we’re all a bunch of vaults who get it as Verge puts it.”

  I glanced at Verge, studying him closely. He did look more relaxed. I didn’t think that was the sangria, but if talking helped him, then I’d be willing. God knew I had enough burdening me from over the years. But I didn’t want it to be Glenna. Her daughter might be okay. I might not feel bad talking about what happened with Glenna if it was her daughter.

  “If Verge trusts you, I’m okay with trusting you,” I hedged, making sure she caught on to what I was getting at.

  “Sounds good. I’ll tell mother and we’ll find somewhere quiet to have breakfast,” she agreed. I nodded and then Verge proved why he was a good friend and the point of calling her over.

  “Okay, so now that we got the healthy, good stuff out of the way, dish on who this new guy is with your half brother,” Verge purred, acting like he was interested in Artur.

  Yeah, he was a good friend.

  “Sorry, cute, adorable, it’s a shame you’re so young and gay, Verge,” she chuckled, bumping shoulders with him. “Artur’s been in love with my brother for a couple hundred years. He used to work here, helping in the stables and Philo liked the horses before planes were ever invented so they were friends when he was tiny, but then Philo started growing up, even before his transition, Artur was sunk. They were hot and heavy before Philo went off to his camp. They still hook up any time he comes home.”

  I bit the inside of my mouth hard enough to taste blood, Verge stepping on my foot when he smelled it. I quickly took a sip of my sangria to clear it out.

  “Our mother and my stepfather—Philo’s father—have always wanted to join our families but their daughters are mated and all that’s left is Artur and he’s gay. In this family, that means Philo, so they’ve definitely encouraged that match. I’m not surprised he’s here. I smell Mother playing cupid.”

  “I thought she liked me,” I bitched under my breath.

  They both gave me a funny look but I didn’t think they understood what I said. Someone announced it was time for dinner before they could ask though and I was grateful for that.

  What I wasn’t grateful for was my place card
on the table across from Philo’s who was next to Artur. Yes, I really wanted a front row seat for that. No, I kinda wanted to die instead. At least Gilroy was on one side of me, Verge on the other, and Xana on the other side of Philo which meant I wasn’t completely alone in the horror show I was about to watch.

  “Dude, you have curls,” Gilroy immediately blurted out as we took our seats.

  “Yes, all my life,” I chuckled nervously, wanting more of that whiskey my metabolism had already burned through.

  “How did none of us know you had gorgeous curls like these?” Verge teased, leaning over and plucking a few of them. Then he flinched against me, and I glanced at him, seeing he was watching Philo.

  Odd.

  “When do we ever dress up at home? I’ve had a lot of people say the curls make me look girly.”

  “I do not know what you normally look like, but there’s nothing wrong with bringing out your feminine side,” Artur offered with a smile. “It suits your face.”

  I went to say thank you but then frowned. Did he just say I had a girly face in a roundabout way?

  Verge kept pawing at them and I shrugged him off. Seconds later my phone vibrated and I pulled it out of my pocket.

  Don’t push me away. It was totally making Philo jealous. Roll with it.

  I shook my head and let my fingers fly over the buttons. Thanks but no. We promised no games. If he wants Artur, then I want him happy. His mom asked him here. It’s not Philo’s game. I don’t want to be that guy.

  Just as I was about to put my phone back in my pocket, it vibrated with another text from Verge. God, you are so sweet and good-hearted it gives me a toothache sometimes.

  I actually smiled at that one and put the phone away.

  “Are you guys done flirting now? It’s not like we didn’t know you were texting each other as we’re sitting right there,” Philo bitched.

  “We weren’t flirting,” I defended, meeting his eyes and trying to ignore the way my heart raced when I saw the anger in them.

  “I was, but Norris is too sweet to play games,” Verge admitted, reaching for the pitcher near him and refilling his glass. My cheeks heated up so I thought some sangria was a good idea.