Love's Indecision Page 4

  Squirting some lube onto my fingers, I pushed two into Lance's tight hole. He cried out and his body started to shake under my touch. I didn't love the idea of doing this in front of people, I'd never been an exhibitionist, but it was part of Lance's humiliation. I knew starting with two fingers would give Lance a bit of pain; I said I wouldn't rip his ass up, not make sure it was purely pleasurable for him.

  When I could move two fingers around inside Lance, I shoved in a third. He screamed, but didn't really sound like he was in pain. Looking under Lance, I could see his cock was rock hard. It hit me then that he seemed to be putting on a show that he didn't want this for the other warriors.

  "Was this your plan all along, Lance?" I whispered as I shoved all three fingers into his ass hard.

  "No, this isn't how I wanted it," he mumbled. Annoyed, I got even rougher with him before he continued. "When I heard Nate talking in his sleep about being with you in the showers, I knew it wasn't just a dream."

  "So you decided to rape him?" I asked in astonishment, not seeing where this conversation was heading.

  "I'm not sure I would even have done it," Lance answered as he looked over his shoulder at me. "I just got so pissed off. Why him and not me? What is it about Nate that everyone fawns all over him and loves him so?"

  "For one, no matter how upset he was at anyone, he would never have even thought to rape them," I ground out to remind him, and myself, how we got there. "This isn't for your enjoyment, Lance. This is supposed to humiliate and humble you."

  "Believe me, I'm humiliated," he said turning back away from me. "This isn't what I ever pictured when I dreamed of being with you."

  That got me to freeze, completely shocked. After a few moments and a couple of deep breaths, I pulled my fingers out of his ass. A large part of me wanted to stop this right then, a small part of me was flattered that Lance wanted me. But it would have gone against the whole point of this to have stopped then, no matter if I'd lost part of my anger at him. He still needed to be taught a lesson for his actions.

  I lined up my now lubed cock with Lance's tight hole. Not holding back, I slammed in all the way to the hilt in one shot. Lance's whole body shivered as he let out a loud groan.

  "That's it, fuck that tight ass into submission," someone yelled out from the group.

  If my head hadn't already been spinning out of control with the new development to this situation, I might have been able to better focus on my surroundings. As it was, I easily blocked out most of the cheering and catcalls. I heard all of them; they just didn't seem to register with my brain right then.

  Lance's body was so tight around my hard cock it made me think back to being with Nate in the showers. I closed my eyes and dreamed I was back there instead of fucking the troublemaker under me with several dozen warriors watching. Pulling back out until just the head of my cock was still in him, I thrust back in as hard as I could. Reaching forward, I grabbed onto Lance's shoulders to get better leverage.

  I pounded into his ass like I've never fucked anyone before. Still pretending it was the man I loved under me, I enjoyed it much more than I would have thought. It was easy to see Lance had very few, if anyone, ever fuck him. Pistoning my hips even faster, I felt my balls start to draw up. I cried out loudly as I came, opening my eyes when I heard someone else cry out.

  Nate was standing in the front of the group, his eyes glued on me. I was still thrusting in and out of Lance's ass when our eyes locked. Before I could even call out to him, he turned and pushed his way through the crowd. I was still shaking from my orgasm when I heard Lance grunt loudly before his ass clamped down on my softening cock.

  Looking down I saw him shoot his load all over the ground. I leaned over and hissed in his ear, "You weren't supposed to have enjoyed this, Lance. If I ever see or hear of you touching someone who doesn't want it again, I will kill you."

  "It won't ever happen again," he panted just before he collapsed on ground muddy with his seed. "I've learned my lesson; I just couldn't control my rage. I swear I'll figure out a way to handle my anger. Please just promise me that you'll fuck me again, without everyone watching this time?"

  "Not going to happen," I answered in disgust as I pulled up my shorts. Lance had a content smile on his face and while I knew it embarrassed him to be taken this way, it was apparent how much he enjoyed it. I shook my head, not sure how I felt about all of this as I retrieved my shirt.

  "What about him?" Dimitri asked me, gesturing over to Lance as I climbed up out of the circle.

  "Take him to the holding cell, I guess," I answered with a deep sigh. "We need to talk about this later, but for now, I need to go after Nate."

  "He was here?" Alexander asked, shock written all over his face. I tried to ignore the way he was touching my best friend. Rolling my eyes at the fact my supposed punishment of Lance was going to help Dimitri's sex life, I simply nodded and broke through the crowd. I ran as fast as I could on shaky legs towards Nate's room. I just hoped that he would give me a chance to explain.

  CHAPTER 4

  "Nate, please open up," I called out as I pounded on his door.

  "Go away," he sobbed. It broke my heart to know he'd been crying. And what was worse, I was the one to have made him cry. Again.

  "Can't do it. Let me in or I'm going to break down the door."

  Without a word, Nate opened the door and walked back to the bed. He threw himself face down on the mattress, still sobbing. I watched, feeling helpless as his entire body shook with the force of his cries. Closing the door behind me, I turned and went over the bed.

  "Please, talk to me," I said as I sat on the bed. When he didn't say anything I leaned over and started rubbing his back.

  "Don't touch me," he yelled as he pulled away from me. That really hurt. I watched in horror as he moved to the far corner of the bed, up against the wall. "I can't believe you would come to me still smelling like that asshole."

  "I'm sorry, Nate," I replied, running my fingers through my hair in frustration. "I wasn't thinking about any of that. I saw your face and all I could think about was getting to you."

  "You enjoyed it," Nate spat out, not as a question, but an accusation.

  "Only because I was picturing being with you, baby."

  "He enjoyed it."

  "I didn't realize that until after I saw you," I replied, nodding. "But I also talked to him, and he hadn't meant to do what he did to you. Lance swore he didn't think he was even going to rape you.”

  Nate just sat there, staring at me with his mouth wide open, "And you believe him?"

  "I think so," I answered with a shrug. "Lance said he heard you talking in your sleep about us being together in the showers. It seems he's had a crush on me and got jealous and filled with rage. I'm not excusing what he did, Nate. I'm just saying, right after the transition it's really hard to control your emotions. So, while I'm not a hundred percent sure I believe him, his story does have merit."

  "And I can't understand because I've not been through my transition, is that right?"

  "I'm not saying that," I said, trying to choose my words carefully. "Maybe you've had a sudden onslaught of emotions at one time or another, where you can understand losing it. That's what it feels like for weeks after your transition."

  Nate sat back against the wall, seeming to ponder over what I just said. "That doesn't make it right."

  "No, it doesn't. But I thought you would want to know that it wasn't something he planned, or maybe didn't even really realize he was doing it. Isn't that better for you to know, rather than think he set out to hurt you?"

  "You're right," he said quietly as he nodded his head. "But I thought fucking him after he lost was supposed to be some humiliating experience? What I saw was two people having enjoyable sex while a bunch of voyeurs watched."

  "It is supposed to demean him, it just didn't work out that way. Fuck," I grumbled, "I didn't know what to do when he told me he wanted me. I mean I was already stretching him out, everyone was watching.
This was supposed to be a message to him and to others that this kind of shit can't be tolerated. If I had stopped there, it would have been like excusing his behavior."

  "I get that you were in a tough spot, but that doesn't mean I have to like it."

  "I wouldn't expect you to," I answered truthfully. "If the tables were turned, I'd be seething. But I'm telling you the truth, Nate. I wouldn't lie to you."

  "I believe that," he answered, still searching my face. "But it still hurts to look at you right now. Can you please just leave me alone for now while I think?"

  "Okay, baby," I said as my head hung down in defeat. For some reason, knowing that looking at me hurt him, I couldn't seem to look at him either. Without another word I left the room. Instead of going back to my room I headed to Dimitri's office.

  Even though I was pretty sure my friend was currently getting lucky, I didn't really have anywhere else to be. On the way, I glanced over to the now empty circle and shuddered. How could I have been so blind as to how Lance felt? I mean, there hadn’t been any outward signs he liked me, but looking back I had to admit that I was the only instructor he didn't give a hard time to.

  I was surprised when I got to Dimitri's office and he was there… making out with his mate like a teenager. Needing a good laugh, I entered the open door and plopped down in one of the chairs to watch. For several moments I just sat there, watching as Alexander and Dimitri continued on, completely oblivious.

  "Can you turn a little so I can get a better view?" I asked, just to be a shit.

  "Get out," Alexander growled, not even looking up from where he was kissing my best friend's neck.

  "Hey, you watched me earlier, tit for tat, my friend," I chuckled.

  "Never took you for a voyeur," Dimitri moaned. "Now get out."

  "We really do need to talk about what I learned, Dimitri."

  "Fine," he grumbled as he pulled away from Alexander. I laughed as I saw that they both had raging hard-ons. Dimitri sat in his chair and pulled Alexander down onto his lap. "Talk fast. I want to pound my cock into my mate's ass."

  "I was thinking the same thing, except my cock in your ass," Alexander purred as he wiggled on Dimitri's lap. "You were in my ass last."

  "Alright guys, I started the joke," I said, putting my hands over my eyes as if to block what I was seeing in my head. "But you're taking it too far. No mental images please."

  "Fine, tell us about Lance," Dimitri replied, running his hands up and down Alexander's arms. "Did I see wrong, or was he enjoying himself?"

  "He wasn't happy about the setting, but it seems he's wanted to be with me for a while now," I said. Then I explained everything Lance told me about Nate, what had happened, and his rage. "I guess I'm just that irresistible."

  "Yeah, yeah, you're a Spanish god," Dimitri chuckled. "Do you think he got the punishment?"

  "To a point, but not like we thought he would," I answered as I leaned back over the chair to stretch out. All the stress had my muscles feeling tight. "So what do we do from here?"

  "Well, he's in lock-up," Alexander replied. I wondered if I should tell them that, as subtle as they were trying to be, I still saw Dimitri's hand playing with Alexander's dick in his pants. "I can understand uncontrollable rage so shortly after someone's transition, but Lance has been a thorn in everyone's ass since he got here."

  "Yeah, but have you ever met the kid's parents? It's a wonder he's not a mass murderer," I answered. "Look, I'm not trying to make excuses for Lance. What he did was wrong. But I also think he knows that, and the farther away we get him from his asshole parents, the larger a chance he has to grow into a fine warrior."

  "You want that task?" Dimitri asked raising an eyebrow. "I'm not suggesting you exploit his feelings for you, but you've gotten through to him. You cared enough to be there for him during his transition when his parents weren't."

  "Fine, I'll try, but I'm not making any promises," I said reluctantly.

  "Good, now get out of here so I can fuck my mate," Alexander said, then moaned.

  I chuckled but looked away; I didn't need to see what Dimitri did to make him moan. "Glad I could help your sex life."

  "Don't kid yourself, brother," Dimitri snickered as he took off his shirt. "Our sex life is off the charts awesome, we didn't need any help."

  I didn't respond, simply walked out of the office and closed the door behind me. Walking back towards my rooms I realized I had a lot of thinking to do; not only about this whole Lance thing, but also Nate, and my feelings with everything that had happened.

  * * * * A week later, Nate was still avoiding me like the plague. He wouldn't talk to me, and wouldn't answer when I spoke to him unless it was in my role as an instructor. The only good thing that happened during the week was that I seemed to be getting through to Lance. Once he saw that even though I didn't return his feelings, I did care for him, his old asshole ways seemed to disappear. It wasn't an overnight transformation, but it was progressive.

  "Okay, I think that's enough for the day," I called out to Lance when I saw he was dragging through the drills I had him running.

  "Matteo, you need to come with me, right now," Yuri yelled as he sprinted towards us.

  "What's wrong?"

  "It's Nate, he's gone into his transition almost a

  week early," he panted as he stopped and tried to catch his breath. At first I just stared at Yuri as if he'd told me I was royalty, frozen where I was standing. Then it was like something snapped inside me and without another thought I took off like a flash towards the infirmary. I heard Yuri and Lance running behind me but I put everything I had into my steps. Since I had always been pretty fast, even by vampire standards, neither of them could keep up with me.

  I busted through the doors of the infirmary, then the trauma room, and skidded to a stop. Nate lay on one of the beds, writhing in pain. Just then he screamed so loudly that I was surprised the windows in the room hadn't broken.

  "I'm here, Nate," I said as I ran to his bed. Reaching down I took his hands in mine and let him squeeze as hard as he could. "Just breathe, baby. Nice, deep breaths."

  "Matteo," he hissed out, the pain written all over his face. "What's wrong? Why am I early?"

  "I don't know, Nate," I answered before looking up at the doctors. "Has anyone contacted his parents?"

  "No, he was just brought in a few minutes ago," one of them answered before walking away.

  "Nate, I'm going to go call your parents, okay?"

  "Just need you here," he whimpered. Then he screamed out in pain again.

  "I know, baby, I'm here. But I have to call them," I replied, kissing his forehead. He let go of my hands and nodded. As much as it killed me to leave him just then, I knew it had to be done. Plus, maybe his parents could shed some light on why Nate was going thought his transition early. I pulled Nate's file as I left the main room and dialed the number to reach his parents.

  "Hello?"

  "Mr. Hathus? This is Matteo Dominguez," I said evenly.

  "Nate? Oh my god, is he okay?"

  "He's going through his transition, sir." "Already? How is that possible?" he asked me.

  "I was hoping you could tell me that, Mr. Hathus. It's important that I know about you and your wife's transition," I explained to him. "A parent's transition can tell us a lot about what to expect."

  "Well, umm, hold on, Matteo." I heard muffled talking in the background. My eyebrows drew together in confusion, why was that such a difficult question?

  "Look, there's something I need to tell you, but Nate doesn't know," Mr. Hathus said when he got back on the phone. "Nate was adopted."

  "We don't have that in our records," I said feeling the anger start to rise in me. "Don't you think the people looking after your son and his transition would need to know that?"

  "We've never told anyone and we didn't see how you knowing he was adopted would matter."

  "It does," I growled trying to stay calm. "Are you sure whomever you adopted him from told you his corre
ct birthday?"

  "Well, that's the thing," Mr. Hathus said, sighing into the phone. "My wife can't conceive children, so when Nate was left as an orphan a friend of ours brought him to us. We accepted him with open arms, grateful for the chance to have a child. But he was already almost a year old at the time. They told us his birth date and whatnot, but as you know, there isn't a way to verify such information."

  "So you were basically guessing and didn't bother to tell us this?" I snarled, fully pissed off at this time. "And he doesn't know this. Great! Just fucking great."

  "We thought it was best he didn't know," Mr. Hathus started to explain, but I cut him off.

  "Fine, at least we know why he's gone into his transition early. I need to go tend to him," I said not looking forward to the hours ahead. "I'm going to have to tell him, he's scared shitless something is wrong."

  "You can't tell him, he'll never forgive us," he gasped.

  "Letting him think he might be dying is better?"

  "Well, no…"

  "I'll figure something out, but I'm not going to hide it from him like you did," I grumbled into the phone, then hung up before he could respond. I knew it was childish, but really, I just didn't have the time or energy to fight with Nate's dad just then. Taking a few deep breaths and collecting myself before going back in the other room, I realized that when I saw Nate, I couldn't lie to him.

  "Nate, I got the answer," I said gently as I reached him. "It's okay that you're going into your transition now. I promise."

  "Why is this happening to me?" he asked, panting. The pain had subsided for the moment, and he looked so wiped. "Am I going to make it?"

  "You'll be fine, baby," I answered stroking his cheek. "I'll explain everything to you later, but it really is okay."

  "Please, just tell me now."

  "I can't do that, Nate. Right now you need to focus on what's happening."

  "Please, Matteo?" he asked, tears forming in his eyes, "I'm scared and I need to know why this is happening early." Nate looked freaked out, and if he didn't calm down soon, his transition would be worse.